If I was a holiday

This past Winter Solstice I decided to participate in a spiritual fruit and water fast. I was not part of a group. I just hung out in my apartment and needlepointed. I didn't listen to music, or watch television, or movies, or read books, or go on the computer. Why I considered it spiritual is because the goal was to create a stillness within myself, and my environment, so that I could see a second as a true second, and not merged with 5 other seconds in a short space of time.

A moment can be very long if we want it to be.

I participated in this fast on the 21st, and the 22nd, and then half of the 23rd. I woke up on the 23rd feeling very good, and also ready to be bored. Needless to say stillness can lead to ennui if not properly combined with euphoria. I didn't have much euphoria so I was bored a bit. I finished a Christmas gift, and my new fouton mattress was delivered, but it was still a tad boring. Not very, because 2 days isn't that long. Also, from about 10pm on the 21st until about 6pm on the 22nd my face HURT, really HURT. I didn't want to participate in a spiritual fast if I had to take pain killers, but I kept at it without the pain killers, and I drank a lot of water. The pain felt like the type of dehydration pain felt in the sinuses. I didn't know if I could be dehydrated so quickly or if it was caused by my lack of coffee for a day. I was pretty surprised it could be either since it was only one day into the fast. Alas, once I drank a lot of water it went away.

The main things I ate were apples. I felt really good when I ate them, and it took me by surprise. I usually didn't eat them growing up as I didn't like the feel on my teeth. However, I basically inhaled them. I didn't eat a lot, mind you, but for a sweet tooth like mine, those apples were nirvana. Also, I would start the mornings with 2-3 lemons squeezed into a cup and added hot water. This does not, I repeat, does NOT taste good. However, I felt really perky. Really, it was a better wake up than coffee. I still do it. Also, if I eat crappy foods I look forward to that lemon water. Make it hot so that the heat can distract you away from the taste.

I planned on participating in the fast until the morning of the 24th. Again, I felt really good on the 23rd. Also, when I looked out my window the day was just gorgeous. I decided what I needed to accomplish with the fast had been accomplished. I was given a signal to rejoin the holiday season.

I've always like Winter Solstice, even better than Christmas. It implies serenity, a calmness. We are so small compared to the stars, it seems to be a good time to relinquish control of the stress from the holidays, and just watch time tick in the solar system.